The first and second child may not always be able to establish a relationship.

"Who do you want: a brother or a sister?" Usually kids are looking forward to the arrival of a new family member. But when a newborn arrives at home, the first child and the second child cannot always establish a relationship.

A little time passes and the elder declares: "You love him more than me!" The younger one will also report that he lacks attention as soon as he learns to speak. The rivalry between the first and second child begins in early childhood. What should I do to prevent this from happening?

The root of the problem is simple and obvious. The eldest sees how his mother devotes all her time to the newborn, spends time with him day and night, and he, who until recently was in charge, is forgotten and abandoned. The solution to the problem is simple - do not forget about the first child while taking care of the second.

In the first months, the younger one sleeps or looks at the world around him. Since the first mother has already gone through the "feed-swaddle-put-down" process, then with the second child it should not take so much time and effort to not devote time to the eldest at all. You need to talk to him, play with him, listen to him, etc. Most likely, then the older kid will not feel lonely.

Where can I get the time? It doesn't take much. The first child can be involved in the joint care of the second. He can serve diapers or wet wipes, watch mom cook porridge, help with the introduction of complementary foods, setting an example for the baby, because it's more fun to eat in the company.

If the first child is already going to kindergarten or school, it is necessary to ask him about his business and successes, praise him, etc. A walk home from school is a great opportunity for socializing. You should not rush unnecessarily, let the eldest child run outside, play and "work up" an appetite for lunch.

What else you shouldn't do is turn the first child into a babysitter for the second. Even if it's a teenager who is quite capable of replacing his mother. The transition age is not an easy time. Helping with a baby can be a heavy burden for a teenager and even a blow to self-esteem: everyone is walking, and I'm with a stroller. He, an almost adult or a young girl, should have time for personal matters.

It is even more dangerous to leave a young first child alone with a second child. The chronicle is full of tragic stories about three- to five-year-old babysitters who stayed with the baby while the mother went to the store. If there is no way out, you can ask for help from a relative, friend, neighbor, hire a babysitter, etc.

The simplest and most effective way to help the first child not feel abandoned for the sake of the second is kind words and familiar rituals. Praise, expressions of love, a kiss goodnight, reading your favorite book, at least for a few minutes, and the baby will know that mom is there and loves him as much as ever. Buy CS2 Cases